Steve Harveys Ten Commandments (Guy Code Analysis)

After watching a bit of Doctor Phil the other day (yes...I know...but Steve Harvey made it tolerable) I caught Steve's segment on his "Ten Commandments to Pleasing your Woman".  He does a really nice job of compiling these 10 things that we men NEED to do, in order to avoid a fight and enjoy our relationships.

I wanted to take a bit of time (and Space) and break these Commandments down for you. 

"Ten Commandants to Pleasing Your Woman"

Commandment 1. Thou Shalt Give her Free Time

Our ladies care about us, they genuinely do.  However, just like us, sometimes they just want to have their own time.  I don't mean to do dishes or laundry...that is not a source of escape or entertainment, contrary to popular belief.  Time with friends or even just some time curled up with some tea and a good book will do.  Whatever the case, give her that time.  There is a really good chance she's earned it.

Commandment 2. Thou Shalt Remember the Small Things

This isn't referencing your car keys or to turn off the iron before you leave for work.  The small things to her, are generally none existent to us.  This is actually a plus, because women don't expect you to remember the small things (they just hope you do).  Make sure that you do remember the arbitrary things in your relationship.  For example, where you took her on your first date, what she ordered and if you're really good, what she was wearing.  Men have given women a reason to get excited about these things, because we naturally overlook them.  Take the time to remember the little things, and you can win some serious points.

Commandment 3. Thou Shalt Consistently find new ways to say "I Love You"

"I Love you" is a powerful phrase.  However, just saying those words over and over again can get a bit repetitive. "Actions Speak Louder than Words" fellas.  So, instead of just telling her you love her, show her.  Maybe surprise her by making a romantic dinner or go out and start her car for her on a cold morning.  It doesn't have to be a grand gesture.  The smallest things can bring a smile to a woman's face.

Commandment 4. Thou Shalt Chip in

This commandment isn't necessarily about money.  Sure, you should pay for things, but I believe this is geared more toward things in your daily schedule.  Unloading the dishwasher, cleaning the bathrooms.  Things that we men consider mundane and unimportant.  News Flash gents, it isn't the 1940's anymore.  Women are independent.  We cannot expect them to sit in the kitchen and stay home with the children.  It's time housework became priorities for both parties.  Just remember to help her out.  It shows that you care about things, that she cares about.

Commandment 5. Thou Shalt Help with the Kids

If you don't have children, that's fine, but if you do, they're yours too.  Help her take care of them.  It shouldn't be a chore or a burden either.  Enjoy the time you have with your children, even it it's changing diapers or giving them a bath.  That time is going to fly by and you don't want to miss out on all of the little things, that actually matter.

Commandment 6. Thou Shalt Embrace the Art of Foreplay

We men are geared for sex at just about anytime.  Foreplay for a man, is walking by Victoria Secret in the mall, it doesn't take much.  Women however, are like a diesel engine, she's gonna need a few minutes to warm up.  We men, take sex for granted a lot of the time.  We're in-out-and on our way.  Women (in most cases) enjoy the emotional aspect of sex.  They like to be romanticized.  Why the hell do you think there are so many soap operas on daytime television? It sure as hell isn't the acting. Women just want to be appreciated, and believe it or not, foreplay is a perfect way to show them your appreciation. 

Commandment 7. Thou Shalt Respect her Schedule

Have you ever tried to get a woman to do something she doesn't want to do?  It's like trying to force a man to watch the Notebook for the 500th time. Yeah, they died together...he loved her a lot, we get it.  I digress...a woman's schedule has to be put into a mans schedule.  You have to work your life around her.  Let's not forget about that little bump in the road we hit every month.  Not only are we not getting sex (or you are if your all about getting those "red wings"), but in some cases we have to deal with a caged lion for a week.  Best advice I can give you is to nod your head and memorize these two words, "Yes, Dear".

Commandment 8. Thou Shalt Send Her Roses, Just Because

Roses are Red, and your balls are Blue, if you never send her roses, she'll never fu*k you.  I may not be the next William Shakespeare, but it conveys a message. Some men don't understand the significance of roses.  Women, for the most part, love flowers.  They also love, showing flowers off to other women.  Your best bet is to have flowers sent to her office or wherever she works.  The other women at work will be jealous and say things like "I wish my bf would send me flowers, that's so sweet."  Remember this, a mans greatest enemy and greatest allies are his ladies friends.  You'll either be praised and loved, or they'll drive over you with a Semi. Send her Flowers and they'll love you.

Commandment 9. Thou Shalt Remember the Golden Rule

The Golden Rule...Treat Others as you want to be treated? No...no...sorry this is with your wife and or girlfriend.  The Golden Rule is simply this, you can be in a happy or you can be right.  If you are arguing with your significant other and you want to remain happy, you let her win that argument.  I don't care if she's calling the NFL the MLB.  You nod your head and agree.  She'll find out the truth eventually, and she can be mad at the person that tells her.  It won't be you and you'll be happy.

Commandment 10. Thou Shalt ALWAYS take Her Side

This is a no brainer.  Anyone who's ever been in a serious relationship, knows not to take someone else s side, against your wife or girlfriend.  You'd be better off just asking for someone to smack you in the balls with a sledge hammer.  You're her crutch, so don't go bailing on her....Ever.  If you do, just go on home and get that couch ready.  Take some books and your pillow, you'll be there for awhile.

Follow these Commandments and you should have a happy life together.  

If you have any Questions or Comments Please post below or Follow us on Twitter @Guy_Code

3 "Tips" On Getting Past the Cock Block

So, you walk into a bar or other social gathering and you spot an attractive female.  You walk up to her and you try to start a conversation, when all of a sudden BOOM! Her uglier, and much meaner friend, whisks her away to the bathroom.  Cock Blocked like a champ...  It's happened to all of us and it sucks.  However, take a step back a minute and think.  This girl has no idea who you are.  She's obviously not comfortable at this event alone or she wouldn't have a friend there with her.  For all she knows, your a rapist and or, serial killer.  Unfortunately, guys like Ted Bundy and Richard Ramirez have made picking up women, even more difficult for us men.  We have to come off confident and clever, while still trying not to look and act like a complete creeper. So what's the key to getting around the cock block? Well, actually, there are three.

Bring a Wingman

The more people you are with the more comfortable you feel right?  When you approach her bring your buddy along. Not only does your friend provide a nice buffer for conversation, but he can also help you with the Cock block. Wingmen have been doing this for years.  It's a proven system.  You just have to find a guy that is willing to bite the bullet.  Just be prepared to do the same thing for your buddy one day.

Have a Solid Ice Breaker

More often than not, women are on their guard from the get go.  You may be attractive and suave, but if she's been hurt before it's going to be ten times harder to start a conversation.  Have a solid ice breaker.  And NO PICK-UP LINES! If you have to make something up, then do it.  I know it sounds bad -starting off an relationship with a lie- but later on down the road, you can explain to her why you did it, and I'm sure she won't hold it against you. You can use one of mine. Try this. "Wow did you see that fight outside? The bouncer just beat the crap out of that guy!"  Obviously, save this one for a bar setting, but it definitely gets her attention.  Women love drama. 

Be Genuine

A woman can always tell if your being sincere or just spewing bull shit.  If she can't tell, then she's too dumb for you, and you should move on.  Stay honest with her (aside from the icebreaker) and she'll hopefully see that you are a good guy.  Remember, if at first you don't succeed, then it wasn't meant to be.  Sometimes she's legitimately, not interested.  There is nothing wrong with that.  Swallow your pride and move on.

I Kissed a Girl and I Liked it.

There's a lot that can be said, about a kiss.  Kisses are like, relationship handshakes. They leave important impressions on the person your kissing. Almost, like a job interview for your relationship promotion.  According to "Hitch", women take that first kiss VERY seriously. They have to be firm, but not smothering.  You want them to be passionate, but not sloppy.  Nobody likes leaving a make out session, looking like they just came down a water slide.   Perhaps, you'll spice it up, and throw in some tongue.  If you are like me, and your tongue is ridiculously wide, maybe it's not a good idea. Along with a Picture of me and my tongue, below is my "TAC" policy for kissing.

 

I want to Kiss her, not Kill her.

The 3 Keys to a Good Kiss

•  Timing-  Make sure it's the right time in your relationship, before you even attempt this.  Mistaking a kiss, for what should have been a hug, is awkward as hell.  You can "kiss", that relationship good bye. See what I did there?  Hehe....I crack myself up....moving on.
• Approach- Much like an Airplane pilot, you have to ease your way onto the runway.  This is a delicate situation, and you shouldn't  go rushing in there, with all your testosterone on full tilt. Approach slowly, but with confidence. 
• Contact- If you've gotten this far, it's all about rhythm from here on out.  Think of it as a dance.  Generally, if it's my first time kissing a girlfriend or acquaintance, I let her do the leading.  I'll simply follow suit and try not to screw things up.

Without sounding like a total jackass, a person can't really explain the exact way to kiss another.  Most of the experience is improvisation. Give and take.  I will say this, the more comfortable you become with another person, the more compatible your kissing will be. The only real way to learn is to get out there and do it. 

Keep in mind, that this is your audition for a shot at sex.  A women isn't just going to sleep with a guy who can't kiss....unless she's drunk...and tells you she wants the lights off...and that there's no talking...and you don't even have to worry about kissing, because she doesn't want to...and if I tell anyone about it, she'll kill me....Er hem...

Just remember the "TAC" policy.  Oh! and don't forget the Tic "Tacs", nobody wants to make out with dog breath.

Leave us a Question or Comment below.  Follow us on Twitter @Guy_Code